So, here’s something worth thinking about…

Say you are an emo – the kinda one who just hates being born. However, you are bright, intelligent, smart, superior. So, you create a time machine to go back in time to kill at least one of your parents before your conception. And you succeed with the time machine. But what about the killing of your parents. Say, it happens, you get to kill your mom or dad before you get conceived. What happens?

How much off a quandary will that be? So, exactly what will happen?

(Yes, I’ve been reading some paradoxes. Logic has always fascinated me. My favourite, so far, being the Liar paradox or the Epimenides paradox. They’re so similar, anyway.)

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This wasn’t a very good day. In fact, it was a rather unproductive one. But if there’s one good thing about it, it’s that I was able to play GetAmped II. It’s not that I’m a big fan but it’s more like I miss playing the games that I used to play. I still miss GrandChase. It’s way better than GetAmped II.

Anyway, I still wasn’t able to see my grade sheet for GS1102 which was the main reason that I wanted to go online today. And I was so dense not to think of asking my instructor about it. But it was a good thing that I posted about it and someone suggested that I do so. Really, what is wrong with me?

So, yes. It was rather disappointing seeing as we are supposed to be able to see our final grades today. I’m still wondering about that course.

Plus, when I was trying to update my blog, I couldn’t because WordPress kept on telling me, “Oops! Please, click here to contact us… so we can fix it.”

Worse still, when I arrived at my place, I found out that the electricity was down. So, yes, it just came back about a few minutes ago. These circumstances are not in my favour.

I thought that the reason I asked for a copy of the College Algebra textbook was so I can get a headstart. And what am I doing? Nothing. What good does that do me? Nothing. All these nothings! It’s not good.

But what’s worse is that I was feeling totally lethargic today. It’s never a good thing. It was like I was drained and didn’t feel like doing anything. I really should make it a point to have a proper breakfast every time, shouldn’t I?

Going back to College Algebra… It’s not like I’ve done absolutely nothing since I got it. I’ve started but it’s not too great to be learning it again. This would be the third time I’ll be having that course. Not good. Well, if there’s a good thing about it, it’s that I already have an idea about it and don’t need to starting from nothing.

So, I was thinking about souls and stuff and I ended up with, “Need I learn to understand Greek and Hebrew and other significant ancient languages and get a copy of the original scriptures?”

I just can’t trust the world, can I?

So, it wasn’t planned. But I can fairly well say that it was the aftermath of a member of the Iglesia ni Cristo buying stuff from our mini-store while a member of Jehovah’s Witnesses was speaking to me. I’m talking about that Iglesia ni Cristo member inviting me to one of their so-called “missions”. Well, I knew why that person came around tonight and I thought that it wouldn’t be polite if I didn’t accept the invitation. So, I did. But it was a good thing as I was able to listen to the most hilarious lecture ever. OK, maybe it wasn’t hilarious and I’m certain that that preacher wasn’t trying to be funny. In fact, he seemed really serious about what he was talking about and only went for humour a few times. But, yes, I made an effort to keep myself together and not start laughing or asking questions that might ruin his entire lecture. Anyway, it didn’t seem like we were to asks questions and neither did he seem open to questions.

But being in that place gave me bits of knowledge about their religion: (1) they acknowledge Jesus Christ as saviour, (2) they believe that sinners burn in hell forever, and (3) they believe that the people of their church, “Iglesia ni Cristo“, are the only ones whom God intends to save and nobody else; among others.

I was totally following that preacher from the very beginning but he started losing me when he came to his second point. I can give them the first one. He pointed that out because there are rumours about their church not believing in Jesus Christ. And, yes, I’ve heard of that. I was totally astounded when I first heard that and couldn’t believe it seeing as the name of their church is “Iglesia ni Cristo“. I mean, why would they name their church to someone they don’t believe in?

Going back to his second point, which was mostly based on the book of Revelation, my immediate reaction was, “Isn’t God supposed to be a merciful one? Why would he let people burn in hell forever if he is merciful? Doesn’t that make him hardhearted?” Of course, I couldn’t say it out loud and neither can I bolt – it would’ve seemed wrong, or very impolite. Besides, don’t they lock their doors when they begin an activity in their church? So, I had no choice but to keep on listening. (And it was a good thing as it’s always nice to have a firm foundation to whatever you stand for.)

However, everything crumbled when he reached his third point stating that only the members of their church has the chance to be saved. My immediate reaction, “That’s just preposterous.” They are on this assumption based on a few verses in the Bible using either “iglesia” or “Iglesia ni Cristo“. He went on further as to say that whichever Bible you refer to, this is what is stated, “Iglesia ni Cristo” and nothing else, whether your Bible is in Filipino, Waray, Hiligaynon, etc. You know what sounded missing? English, yes. He could cite all those dialects but he couldn’t mention it. At least, not until later. I wasn’t actually sure what I wanted him to do, to keep on making people believe that all versions of the Bible state “Iglesia ni Cristo” which will inevitably include English or for him to plainly he state that even a Bible written in English will say so. Either way, he loses and lies. Why? Because I am pretty sure that I’ve read the words “Church of Christ” in a Bible written in English but not the words “Iglesia ni Cristo“. Not that I read a Bible in any other language or dialect, for that matter. In the end, he went on to doing the latter.

It’s a good thing that I know how to make myself behave properly in different situations. If I didn’t, I would’ve asked him loads of questions, most of them I wouldn’t know how to state in plain Filipino which is what he was using. (Yeah, my Filipino is weaker than my English.) Besides, I argue better in English.

The major reason I went there, besides not wanting to be rude, was because I wanted to learn about them and, well, give them a chance. They lost it. However, none of those would compare to a few words that the preacher stated to emphasise his third point, “See, this is why we became members of this church! We wanted to be saved and the Bible states that this is the only church the God will save!… I used to be a die-hard Baptist. Most of us used to be firm believers in our previous religion. But the Bible says that this is the only church He will save.”

Besides all those sounding all wrong, seeming like the only reason he became a member of Iglesia ni Cristo, and most others among them, was that he wanted to be saved and that he had come to believe that it was the sole church that God will save and not that he wanted to follow God and Christ or that he found truth in that church, I was like, “Wasn’t the Bible written in the ancient times? And wasn’t your church founded in the Philippines with your current head being only either third or fourth generation from your founder?” You can only imagine the repercussions of his statements.

Yes, it was some sort recruitment talk but the only thing that guy did for me was discredit his own church and tell me that the God they believe in is a rather cruel one.

Oh, one more thing, before I was able to get out of their church grounds, the person who invited me sort of gave me a handshake and another invitation. This time, to their church service or worship or whatever they call it. I got out of it by telling him that I wouldn’t be able to come because I don’t usually wake up until about 8am or even 9am. (Their Sunday worship is at 7am.) At least, I didn’t lie.

Ah, the flowers smell so beautiful.

I hate this full-day black-outs that the electricity supplier here sometimes imposes. It limits the stuff that you can do. I mean, what are you supposed to be doing in twelve hours without electricity?! I can hardly think of too many. It’s a good thing they didn’t wait until 5pm or they finished whatever they were trying to do (Usually, it’s a clearing operation.) before 5pm.

But, perhaps, it is a good thing. Sometimes, it is a good thing to be unplugged from technology. You get to be able to do stuff that you won’t usually do; like read something on print, write with paper and ink, or draw with a pencil and stuff. Still, I wouldn’t be looking forward to a whole day without electricity.

So, the plan said that the game will be “based on Philippine history” so that it will have the potential of being used as an educational material. I kinda thought that history is a rather boring subject and that teaching it is very difficult. However, if the teacher is to use interactive materials, it will be much easier. Or, so I thought.

However, I am such a sucker for knights, castles, and bricks – brick houses, brick roads, the lot. I wonder if I can weave them together. I should be able to. The plot matters a lot to me but I know that there is some way to twist them together.

Either way, I will have to do my homework. Research, that is.

I must resolve not to take any more unnecessary breaks.

Documentation, documentation, documentation. Is is really that important? Well, I read something that said something like, if you’re code is not worth documenting, then it’s not worth anything. And, I think, that applies to more than just code. Whatever you’re doing, maybe, just maybe, if it is worth anything, then it must be documented.

I have to start that habit.

Another day, another challenge. Great. Well, I didn’t really receive it early in the day and neither was it exactly a challenge directed at me. It wasn’t even a statement of a challenge! It was just a statement that amped up my meter. And that is most definitely a good thing as those are the kinds of things that keep me pushing. And, anyway, it’s always good to have a reboot of your motivation.

So, the day before yesterday, that was when I dealt with my room, I found some sort of document. Right, document is just too formal. Well, anyway, it was some sort of something and when I read it, it was, apparently, my old dev plan for a game I wanted to create. It’s nothing revolutionary, really but, for starters, it’s rather ambitious.

And, it connects with what I received today because the challenge was connected to it. And when things go together, something good is happening. Which leads me to conclude that I gotta pick up those pieces of paper and start working towards that game again. It’s not something I can create in the blink of an eye and given my skills, it’s gonna be a while. But don’t they say that big things always start with a small step? And that is exactly what I’m gonna do. Taking small steps at a time, building things one at a time, and, in time, the pieces will become a whole.

Oh, man! This isn’t such a great day. It’s raining hard – too hard for anyone’s good. But the weather people never say that there is a storm anywhere near here. They always say that the weather is due to the “tail-end of a cold front” – whatever that is and wherever it is, I don’t have much of an idea.

And this weather is not doing me any favors, either. Like I said, the rain’s too hard for anyone’s good. But I should still be thankful because it’s not as bad here as in Australia or Northern Samar or…

Scary. An actual “chainsaw massacre”. Right here in the Philippines. Down south in Mindanao. But, I guess, it’s not such an impossible circumstance. Films, after all, always have an anchor of truth in real life; no matter how exaggerated they may be. Then, there’s the more recent bus bombing. It also makes you realise how security is mere wishful thinking. There is no safe place.

Ah, peace. It’s such an abstract thought. The human race have long thought of it but it just seems that no one can put that thought in reality.

Right. So, as a complement to my rather unproductive yesterday, I was able to deal with my room today. I wasn’t able to finish though. I discovered an area that needs some TLC that I didn’t think of dealing with today. I couldn’t go through it either because of the time. At least, not today. I won’t plan again as to when I will go deal with that corner because there is a pretty good chance that it won’t happen since I’m me and plans are never a good idea for me.

So, tomorrow, the grade books should be open already as a new school week should be starting. And that means that I should make sure to be able to check on it as, just in case there’d be a problem, it won’t be too late to file a request. But I definitely am not looking forward to any problems. I can only hope for the better.

So nothing good came out of my day today. And there is nothing good about that either. See, this is why I rarely make plans. They never work out for me. Yeah, that includes my room. Attending to it would have to be moved to tomorrow because my mother just had to make me do something. I can’t complain either. She will just keep on nagging me about it so I was better off doing it today. But as is the case, I, evidently, wasn’t able to attend to my stuff. But, anyway, I have time as the finals is over and a new term has not yet started.

And, speaking of finals, my schoolmates say it was normal for the grade books to be gone during the finals week. I don’t remember it happening last term, though. But, at least, I am certain it’s not just me.

Well, given the time, I’m going for Artemis Fowl.

I just remembered something. Didn’t I say last time that I will finish with my room “this coming Tuesday”? And that is tomorrow. Not good. And I started reading Artemis Fowl tonight!

But, anyway, I have to finish with my room. Though, it is a pretty certain thing that I will be taking breaks. Therefore, I could still give some time to the fifth Artemis Fowl.

So, I wanna start reading a book. And I’ve been wanting to but I couldn’t because the finals is coming up. And I wasn’t talking about a textbook. But a book, a story, fiction. I couldn’t be worrying too much and truth be told I am the kind of person who can let go of worries easily enough. They just don’t stick with me. Like, they just fly away. No matter what they are.

Plus, TobyMac’s album, Tonight, is definitely up-ing my mood. Most especially his song with Israel Houghton, Break Open the Sky.

Break open the sky
Won’t You turn off gravity so we can fly?

This wasn’t a very bad day and I don’t plan on ending it yet. However, I couldn’t say it is a particularly because I am so uncertain about what happened to my finals exams.

See, when I was trying to submit my answers for English, the browser returned with a “Network Error”. And being me, I was so dense to hit reload instead of just clicking the back button. Though, I am not so sure which would have been more stupid as we were only allowed one attempt for final exams. The thing is, when I hit reload nothing displayed on the marks and grade section of the grade sheet. And I don’t know about the grade book because it seemed empty for me. I don’t think it happened every final exams because I don’t remember that happening last term.

Also, about the same thing happened for my Introduction to Programming final exam. I didn’t hit a network error but nothing appeared in the grade sheet either. And the grade book for that course was empty, too.

Not empty like there are no grades for each unit but empty like there is absolutely nothing in left there except for the headings. The same thing for both courses. But the grade books for my courses from last term was very much visible.

Really, I don’t know what happened there. And, I so don’t know how to feel right now. It’s just not right.